I had a friend ask me tonight how well I knew Vince. Well, I met him on Saturday. I don't know him well and have never claimed to.
Its hard to explain how I feel so emotional about someone that I just met. All I know is that it was very surreal to me while I was there at Bass Lake. Some groups of us walked around and yelled his name for a while and the entire time, you just keep thinking that this person who has been missing for the past four hours is just going to walk out of the woods and say that he went on a little walk and he was sorry that he had everyone so worried.
When I got home, I went to my room and cried for a long time. I called a good friend and he came right over to give me a hug and make sure that I was ok. Yes, I'm fine. It's just that you never think that things like this will happen to you or your friends. To see my friends so upset really upset me. To date, this is the scariest thing that has ever happened to me. Not so fun.
None of this has been on the news and even though this may not be seen as quite as tragic as a family of four being missing, it is equally as horrifying that something like this can happen when so many people are around.
I'm not going to apologize for being personal because...well, this is my blog and when haven't I been personal? It's Monday night as I'm writing this and the search will continue tomorrow.
I hope to be back to posting my usual crazy life soon.
4 comments:
Steph, thanks for sharing this journal with us. They say that what is most personal is also the most universal and it is so true. Many of us have had experiences like this in our lives and it's important to share and have a genuine communication about the realities of our lives. If some folks reveal their insecurities by criticizing that, it's only a reflection on them.
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.”
Theodore Roosevelt
So I am sensing a war here. I noticed a comment ealier by somebody expressing their feelings that this blog was too personal. I really don't care because I don't really know the situation. But I don't think everybody should attack everybody else, especially on such horrible issue. This is a time to come together, not tear each other apart because so and so is insecure etc etc. .... just because somebody feels her blog is too personal that doesn't mean that they are insecure. THey just feel that things should kept be kept private out of respect for other people.
yes it is her blog, BUT it is a private and somewhat sacred thing when somebody dies, it doesn't need to be broadcast all over the world. I think that somebody was simply stating that as their opinion.
what's hard in this situation is that what's so personal to Vince's family and close friends is now being tragically exposed to readers w/out closure. the event itself is so difficult to be apart of (as steph, myself, and the other 19 know), however leaving a post w/out any such closure is hard (yeah, i guess i'm a psychologist at heart). keep him and his family in your prayers.
Here's the deal. I've been writing about MY situation. MY feelings. My opinions are not insensitive and this little blog isn't exactly broadcast all over the world. 100 people checked it yesterday. I chose to blog about this because its the way that I decided to deal with the situation. If you have a problem with it, stop reading my blog. Your choice. I've blogged about death a few times on this blog and no one seemed to have a problem with it before. If you're shocked, you should be. I have been for a few days now. Unless you were there, you have no place to talk.
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